Diet woes...

Just want to say that its hard as hell going from a crappy diet to a restrictive, bodybuilding cutting diet.

Incorporation: Harder than I thought

Okay, I started to truly incorporate my diet AND my workout. And then I fell off the diet in a matter of 2 days. Way off. Like western Siberia off. But hey, that's why pencils come with erasers, right? Right? <crickets>

Anyway this is why I started 17 weeks out as opposed to 12 weeks. Gives me a little leeway to figure this out. Chaos at home (so what else is new?) has made it even more difficult to eat & train on a consistent schedule. Even more important to train in the early morning before work.

I haven't uploaded the self shots. Probably my next post. In the interim, I have a much clearer picture in my mind of the body type I want. <Here> or <Here #2>.

You'll notice that although these 2 gentlemen are large, they still have a classic 'X frame', unlike the gentlemen in <Here #3>. Hey, no disrespect to these guys, its just way too extreme.

A little honesty...

I'm a 41 year old male. College graduate. Married. Two kids. House. Two cars. Steady job. I also have a problem with follow through. I dream big dreams. Huge, impossible/improbable dreams. Smaller ones too. I start on little and big projects (too many to list), get a little something done and then...drop it. Probably for a variety of reasons, not just one. Fear of completion or success, laziness, not taking all the parts of the project into consideration and ending up with a huge mess, lack of funds, lack of interest. The list probably goes on and on. I have another issue: whenever I take on a new project and actually finish it, two things happen: 1) I usually take no pride or interest in the completed work. I may brag about it to others but the project has no intrinsic value. The second thing that happens - and is somewhat related to the first - is that I can't believe the project actually got done. I disassociate from it. To me, someone else did the work and I just sat back. I mean to change that. Shortly after I turned 41 I decided (somewhat on a whim) to take on a new project: ME. I decided I would train and enter a bodybuilding contest. Its a narcissistic sport to be sure but it had and still has, intrinsic value to me. My hope/end goal is that by going through the rigorous process of training and dieting and shaving and posing is not to win - although that would be great and I will train to win - but to compete and more importantly, to LOOK like I belong up there. I am hoping there will be some sort of "trickle down" effect on the rest of my life. I want to cut through all the negative (inside and outside voices) that are telling me one reason or the other why I can't do this. "Too old" "bad genetics" "you're a quitter and always have been" "You like Twinkies too much".

I picked out a contest and contacted the promoters about any prerequisites for competing. Just pay the fee: $100. The date: November 12, 2011. The place: NYC. The contest: NPC Eastern Bodybuilding Contest.
I'm starting this online journal as I am starting the 'cutting' diet. 17 weeks of cutting. And yes, I will post progress pictures. Just a couple of more notes: Competing clean with no steroids. I don't have an issue with 'roids per se, I just want to do this clean. Personal choice.